Jesus
God
The Holy Spirit
My Daughter
My Son
Any future children
My Wife
The Church
My Mom and Dad
My Sisters
my grandparents
my aunts and uncles
that my extended family is awesome
my in-laws, including the extended family I married into
Old Friends
New Friends
when worship music makes me cry
any children
Any ice cream that doesn't have nuts in it.
Dark Chocolate
Board Games
Video Games
pretending
day dreaming
Books that make you wonder where the day has gone
the smell of cookies baking
the small of the beach in late summer
Peanut Butter and Strawberry Jam
Motorcycles
Scuba Diving
Wind
Long, Almost-too-hot showers
Getting into a hot car
Snow Skiing
Ireland
Red-heads
green eyes
freckles
watching couples hold hands or kiss
kittens
Evergreen Trees
Mountains
when I am writing well and consitantly
sarsaparilla
french fries
bare feet
The Holy Spirit
God
Jesus
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Monday, October 17, 2011
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Before Brad@Home/The Renewing Mind: It's Official.
I am no longer a Californian.
I had this idea in my head that I am from where ever I have spent the most time living. I spent 16.2 years in California. I have now spent 17.1 years in Illinois. So, by my own way of thinking about things, I have ceased to be a Californian and am now an Illinoian. Is that how you say it? Is it Illini?
I don't really have an issue with this, although throughout the years I have staunchly defended my association with the Golden State. I grew up in the OC before it was the OC. I lived there during the San Fransisco earthquake and during the Los Angeles riots. Until my parents moved us away, it had never occurred to me that I would like anywhere else. While I really enjoyed growing up there, I see it now and it doesn't feel like home anymore. It hasn't for a while. It's changed too much without me there to change in conjunction.
There is a small issue in that Illinois doesn't really feel like home either. I have nothing against Illinois. With the exception of some brutally cold winters that I have never really gotten used to, it has treated me fairly well. I went to college here, I met most of my closest friends here, I met and married my wife here, my children are being born here. Yet, as a place, it still doesn't feel like home.
Really, I don't believe there is any place on earth where I could settle and think of as home. Home as a location is something I don't believe in as something that can be attained on earth. Where ever God is, that will be my Home. That concept isn't tied to a place anymore.
I'll admit that sometimes that makes me a little sad. I long for the settled feeling home brings, I want a place where I can complete relax, and I know now that I can only get small slices of that here, and mostly through the people I spend my time with, not where I spend it.
So, I'm no longer a Californian, but I'm not really an Illinoisian either. I'm a Christian.
I had this idea in my head that I am from where ever I have spent the most time living. I spent 16.2 years in California. I have now spent 17.1 years in Illinois. So, by my own way of thinking about things, I have ceased to be a Californian and am now an Illinoian. Is that how you say it? Is it Illini?
I don't really have an issue with this, although throughout the years I have staunchly defended my association with the Golden State. I grew up in the OC before it was the OC. I lived there during the San Fransisco earthquake and during the Los Angeles riots. Until my parents moved us away, it had never occurred to me that I would like anywhere else. While I really enjoyed growing up there, I see it now and it doesn't feel like home anymore. It hasn't for a while. It's changed too much without me there to change in conjunction.
There is a small issue in that Illinois doesn't really feel like home either. I have nothing against Illinois. With the exception of some brutally cold winters that I have never really gotten used to, it has treated me fairly well. I went to college here, I met most of my closest friends here, I met and married my wife here, my children are being born here. Yet, as a place, it still doesn't feel like home.
Really, I don't believe there is any place on earth where I could settle and think of as home. Home as a location is something I don't believe in as something that can be attained on earth. Where ever God is, that will be my Home. That concept isn't tied to a place anymore.
I'll admit that sometimes that makes me a little sad. I long for the settled feeling home brings, I want a place where I can complete relax, and I know now that I can only get small slices of that here, and mostly through the people I spend my time with, not where I spend it.
So, I'm no longer a Californian, but I'm not really an Illinoisian either. I'm a Christian.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Sensitive Geek MAN: There is no crying in Baseball
I am not a 'Sports' person.
Growing up as a boy, this causes some sociological issues. A big way that boys hang out or play and get to know each other is through sports. If you are a boy that doesn't like sports, then you have a significant handicap in making other boy friends.
It isn't like I didn't try. I was in soccer as a kid, but I was the kid who just stood in the middle of the field staring at the sky or a tree or kicking an imaginary ball rather than the real one. Needless to say I didn't excel.
I also kept trying to play with my friends. I shot hoops, I hit baseballs, I tried to catch footballs, nothing really clicked. The friends of mine who were kind allowed me to be horrible but still play without mocking, but I never enjoyed it.
It wasn't that there aren't sports that I like. I like climbing, I like downhill skiing, but the issue is that you don't really do those together. You only need one other person to climb, and you don't need anyone to ski. So those sorts of activities aren't good at bonding and team building.
What I excelled at was video games, but this was at the beginning of video games, so it wasn't culturally accepted to sit around and play video games all day. I also was good at 'make believe' games, but my male friends grew out of that faster than I did. Especially seeing as I still haven't.
Finally, in college things started to coalesce. Not that I got better at sports, just that it became easier to find people who liked the things I like. Also, as I have gotten older, I have started to find things to like in sporting events. It will never be my thing, but relationships are partly about compromising so everyone can benefit.
So i watch the Super Bowl, and even enjoy the game, although I am really there to talk, eat, and watch the commercials.
I go to the (very) occasional basketball game, and (again) enjoy the game, but am really there to talk, eat, and watch the spectacle that happens when the team isn't playing.
But I will never get the appeal of baseball.
Growing up as a boy, this causes some sociological issues. A big way that boys hang out or play and get to know each other is through sports. If you are a boy that doesn't like sports, then you have a significant handicap in making other boy friends.
It isn't like I didn't try. I was in soccer as a kid, but I was the kid who just stood in the middle of the field staring at the sky or a tree or kicking an imaginary ball rather than the real one. Needless to say I didn't excel.
I also kept trying to play with my friends. I shot hoops, I hit baseballs, I tried to catch footballs, nothing really clicked. The friends of mine who were kind allowed me to be horrible but still play without mocking, but I never enjoyed it.
It wasn't that there aren't sports that I like. I like climbing, I like downhill skiing, but the issue is that you don't really do those together. You only need one other person to climb, and you don't need anyone to ski. So those sorts of activities aren't good at bonding and team building.
What I excelled at was video games, but this was at the beginning of video games, so it wasn't culturally accepted to sit around and play video games all day. I also was good at 'make believe' games, but my male friends grew out of that faster than I did. Especially seeing as I still haven't.
Finally, in college things started to coalesce. Not that I got better at sports, just that it became easier to find people who liked the things I like. Also, as I have gotten older, I have started to find things to like in sporting events. It will never be my thing, but relationships are partly about compromising so everyone can benefit.
So i watch the Super Bowl, and even enjoy the game, although I am really there to talk, eat, and watch the commercials.
I go to the (very) occasional basketball game, and (again) enjoy the game, but am really there to talk, eat, and watch the spectacle that happens when the team isn't playing.
But I will never get the appeal of baseball.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
The Renewing Mind: Not the End
Today I truly meant to write something lighter and playful, perhaps, if I was lucky, even funny.
But then I learned that the son of a friend of mine died.
I don’t pretend to really know what that must be like. I have only had grandparents die. While that was painful, the relationship from my end is different. I try to imagine what it would be like to have my daughter die; just the thought is enough to make me almost burst into tears. When I think of it, it is like the muscles in my chest try to crush my heart. That is just thinking about it, so I can barely fathom what experiencing it would be like.
To any of you suffering from this tragedy, or from any other loss of life, you have my deepest sympathies.
Death is a tragedy. I have never really understood those who claim that death is a part of life, that it is natural. We were meant for eternity, to live forever in God’s presence. The death of a being made in God’s likeness is anything but natural. Our spirits should have been so full of the light and life of God that we never age, never die. Death is a consequence of the nature we all now inherit. As my pastor said recently, we are made in the likeness of God, but unfortunately born with the likeness of Adam. So as death should have never come to us, it is only right that we should mourn when anyone dies.
Becoming a believer means that the likeness of God in you has been redeemed. While we will all still die a physical death, our souls will live on with God. This makes the grieving process a strange affair. You know that death is not the end for any believer. You know that you will see them again and in the best of circumstances. A Christian doesn’t mourn the loss of a fellow believer, because no fellow believers are ever lost. We mourn because we can’t immediately follow and must live more years without them. We don’t mourn so much for them leaving as for us staying.
The True Tragedy comes when those we love die without Christ. They will be separate from God, and therefore us as well. That is something over which to truly grieve. That is something that we should fight against with everything we are. That convicts me—that I am such a coward that I don’t share Jesus with everyone I meet.
To my friend whose son has gone ahead, I am so sorry. I hope that our Lord Jesus would make His face to shine upon you and your family and give you all peace.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Sensitive Geek MAN: Come and see the incredible golf ball whacker guy...
I have never been a "sports" guy.
I have pretty much become okay with that now, but growing up it made things difficult when it came to friend-making. There is a strange amount of pressure on boys (at least when I was growing up) to be involved in sports in some manner. You should play them if you can. If you can't, you should watch them.
As far as the 'standard' sports are concerned, I did neither. I could just never get to the point where I thought sports were that interesting.
But because it seemed expected, I gave it a shot. I ended up finding a few sports I enjoyed, but they are all individual sports: skiing, rock climbing, cycling, running, etc. Team sports never appealed, and I think a big reason is that, in team sports, there are other people depending on you to do your job. And I am bad at sports. I don't pick up on them quickly, usually. So having others on a team who are depending on me to perform decently was very stressful.
Eventually, I got older and my friends got older and we have come to an understanding: I'm bad at sports and don't enjoy watching them, but I will play and watch because we are friends. My friends understand that, when I play, I will be not doing well. When I watch, I will be asking lots of questions. We are finally old enough where that all works out.
I bring this up because, yesterday, I went to play golf with a friend of mine who is getting married. I went because he is my friend and I wanted to hang out. He (and his family) are good at golf. I am NOT. I would say I am even below my normal average for sports when it comes to golf.
He was very supportive. I asked for pointers and he was good and patient about giving them. I improved a little and I think we all had fun.
and it only took us 5 1/2 hours to finish 18 holes.
I have pretty much become okay with that now, but growing up it made things difficult when it came to friend-making. There is a strange amount of pressure on boys (at least when I was growing up) to be involved in sports in some manner. You should play them if you can. If you can't, you should watch them.
As far as the 'standard' sports are concerned, I did neither. I could just never get to the point where I thought sports were that interesting.
But because it seemed expected, I gave it a shot. I ended up finding a few sports I enjoyed, but they are all individual sports: skiing, rock climbing, cycling, running, etc. Team sports never appealed, and I think a big reason is that, in team sports, there are other people depending on you to do your job. And I am bad at sports. I don't pick up on them quickly, usually. So having others on a team who are depending on me to perform decently was very stressful.
Eventually, I got older and my friends got older and we have come to an understanding: I'm bad at sports and don't enjoy watching them, but I will play and watch because we are friends. My friends understand that, when I play, I will be not doing well. When I watch, I will be asking lots of questions. We are finally old enough where that all works out.
I bring this up because, yesterday, I went to play golf with a friend of mine who is getting married. I went because he is my friend and I wanted to hang out. He (and his family) are good at golf. I am NOT. I would say I am even below my normal average for sports when it comes to golf.
He was very supportive. I asked for pointers and he was good and patient about giving them. I improved a little and I think we all had fun.
and it only took us 5 1/2 hours to finish 18 holes.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Sensitive Geek MAN: Say Hello to my little friend
I am always the first person up in my house on the weekdays, and today is no exception. It is just before 7 as I am writing and I have already been on a run and eaten breakfast, checked all my email, and now written this post.
While being up isn't different, getting all that other stuff done is. Usually I need to be out of the house by 6 in order to make it to work by 7:30, but today I am taking off work to go stand up in a friends wedding. I enjoy weddings. I usually have fun at them, and I am still somewhat of a romantic (regardless of what my wife may think), so the idea of weddings appeals to me.
This particular wedding is interesting, because i am standing up in it, and because this particular friend and I have not know each other long in the Grand Scheme.
However, he is one of those people with whom I have developed a particular and special bond, and quickly at that. I hope anyone reading understands what I mean. A person who very quickly gets you and whom you get. One of those friendships that becomes tight rapidly and is naturally relaxing. It's very nice.
I have had several of those types of friendships over the years. I am happy to say that I am still friends with almost all of them, regardless of my lack of long distance communication skills. That is another nice thing about those types of friendships: distance and time are less of a hindrance than with other friendships. Which is good, since for some unknown reason, many of my friends of this sort feel the need to move rather far away once we have our friendship established.
Now, I don't want you to think that I somehow value these friends more. The value of a relationship is not the ease of the relationship. It isn't necessarily that these are better friends, although some of them make up some of my very close friends. These friends just come more easily and quickly. There is an appeal to that. However, I also find that there is a great deal to be said for friends with whom I have had to put in a lot of work and years of time. These friends have been proven by fire. We may not have as much in common naturally and our times together may not be as peaceful, but we have proven the friendship time and time again, and it has grown us in doing so.
Really, I am thankful that God brings these different types of relationships to us. I learn things from each of my friendships; other than Himself, they are the best teacher He's given me.
While being up isn't different, getting all that other stuff done is. Usually I need to be out of the house by 6 in order to make it to work by 7:30, but today I am taking off work to go stand up in a friends wedding. I enjoy weddings. I usually have fun at them, and I am still somewhat of a romantic (regardless of what my wife may think), so the idea of weddings appeals to me.
This particular wedding is interesting, because i am standing up in it, and because this particular friend and I have not know each other long in the Grand Scheme.
However, he is one of those people with whom I have developed a particular and special bond, and quickly at that. I hope anyone reading understands what I mean. A person who very quickly gets you and whom you get. One of those friendships that becomes tight rapidly and is naturally relaxing. It's very nice.
I have had several of those types of friendships over the years. I am happy to say that I am still friends with almost all of them, regardless of my lack of long distance communication skills. That is another nice thing about those types of friendships: distance and time are less of a hindrance than with other friendships. Which is good, since for some unknown reason, many of my friends of this sort feel the need to move rather far away once we have our friendship established.
Now, I don't want you to think that I somehow value these friends more. The value of a relationship is not the ease of the relationship. It isn't necessarily that these are better friends, although some of them make up some of my very close friends. These friends just come more easily and quickly. There is an appeal to that. However, I also find that there is a great deal to be said for friends with whom I have had to put in a lot of work and years of time. These friends have been proven by fire. We may not have as much in common naturally and our times together may not be as peaceful, but we have proven the friendship time and time again, and it has grown us in doing so.
Really, I am thankful that God brings these different types of relationships to us. I learn things from each of my friendships; other than Himself, they are the best teacher He's given me.
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