I had never really been “sporty.” In elementary school I stood on a field
and stared at the sky while a bunch of other kids in matching uniforms played soccer
around me. In junior high, I managed to make it on the football team thanks to
a growth spurt that left me larger than almost everyone else. In High School I
wrestled till I tore a tendon in my shoulder. In college, friends invited me to
play basketball with them, mostly for the humor value.
After I graduated, I did enough to stay attractive to members of the
opposite sex. After I got engaged, my wife and I did the least amount of
training required to do Sprint-length Triathlons, mostly as incentive to look
good in wedding pictures. We actually did keep it up until she had the blood
clot issues.
When I decided to embark upon the Fire Fighter adventure, I realized I
would have to get to a different level of fitness. After a little bit of
research, I decided that the p90x routine seemed the best routine to cover all
the bases. The workouts are excellent, but the schedule (if you stick to it
strictly) is daunting. Between 2009 and 2011, I did the first 5 weeks of the
routine easily half dozen times.
When I walked into the CPAT facility, I had also been taking EMT
classes for a month or so, along with my marriage and my full-time job. You
could say that I was burning the candle with a butane torch.
They start off with a short orientation video that explains what to
expect-in case you don’t know how Google works. The CPAT is a times test. You
have 10 min and 20 seconds to finish 8 exercises. Since the first event is a
stair climb that lasts 3 min, you really have 7 min and 20 seconds to finish 7
exercises—assuming you make it off the stair machine. With one exception, you
can never run in or between exercises.
I was led into the testing facility, a basketball-court sized room
filled with intimidating apparatus. I talked a bit with some of the other men
testing. Every one of them had some story directly related to Fire Service:
switching between departments, just having graduated from Fire Academy, part of
a Fire Fighting legacy. Just before my turn, the judges had me put on a helmet,
work gloves, and a 50 lb vest that I would have to wear for the duration of the
test to simulate the normal Firefighting gear.
I sat down in a molded plastic chair and watched the person in front of
me finish up the stair climb.
Exercise 1 was the Stair Climb. As my turn came up, the judges put an
additional 20 lbs on my shoulders, to simulate a High Rise pack, for a grand
total of 70 lbs. I got on the stair machine for a 20 second “warm up” that I
didn’t want (but luckily didn’t count toward the overall time). When the warm
up period was over, the stair speed increased to 1 step every second, with I
had to keep up for 3 minutes. I sang a slow Be
Thou My Vision in my head to the beat of my steps, mostly to distract
myself, but partly to keep rhythm. By the end, my legs were shaking and I was
gulping air.
I got a 5 seconds break as the judges removed the additional 20 lbs.
The judge assigned to follow me through the test followed me as I moved to the
next event. He reminded me that I was not allowed to run between events (not
that I could have) and started telling me the rules of the next exercise. My
brain registered that he was speaking, though his words seemed a barely coherent
and mostly ignored mash.
Exercise 2 was the Hose Drag—the only event where I would be allowed to
run. I picked up a fire hose, threw an end over my shoulder and ran—really a
slightly faster walk—30 feet, where I took a 90 degree turn around a barrel and
ran another 30 feet to the goal. Once I passed the goal, I turned, dropped to
one knee, and pulled the rest of the hose to me. I didn’t watch it come, just
waited for my brain to register that the judge said stop. My knees wobbled as I
stood to move to the next exercise.
Exercise 3 was the Equipment Carry. One at a time, I took a chainsaw
and a concrete saw off a shelf and put them on the ground. Then I picked them
both up, one in each hand, and carried them in a 50 ft loop. Then I put them
both on the floor and, one-at-a-time, put them back on the shelf.
Exercise 4 was the Ladder Raise. I picked an extension ladder off the
ground and raised it up against a wall by walking my hands up the rungs, one by
one. I was not allowed to skip any rungs. Once it was up, I used the rope to
raise the extension up and lower it again in a controlled manner.
Exercise 5 was the Breach. I picked up a 2-handed sledge and began
beating it against a contraption meant to simulate the effort needed to beat
down a door. Once I’d delivered the necessary force, a buzzer went off and I
carefully put the sledge back.
Exercise 6 was the Search. I dropped down on all fours and crawled into
a tunnel. Once past the initial entry point, it was black. It is a 50 ft crawl
over, around, and under obstacles in the pitch. The hardest part was resisting
the urge to just lie in the dark.
Exercise 7 was the Rescue Carry.
Any rest I’d gotten in the Search tunnel (not much) was lost as I
grabbed a 130 lb dummy by a harness and dragged it in a 50 ft loop. There is
really no comfortable way to do that while also wearing a 50 lb pack.
Exercise 8 was the Ceiling Breach and Pull. 1 set consists of using a
fireman’s pike to push a 60 lb plate up 3 times and then pull a 80 lb weighted
hinge down 5 times. To pass this exercise, I needed to complete 4 repetitions.
As I started my 4th repetition, I ran out of time.
My judge immediately took the weight off my back and led me into a side
room to cool down. I paced around the room, gasping air and swallowing a lot
lactic acid, trying not to be sick. A judge waited behind a small table. He
reminded me that I was entitled to retest as long as I could take it before the
end of the day. Once I had settled down enough, I signed my form confirming
that I failed and drove home.
